So I was commissioned to write a vanilla column under a psuedonym, and I’m hoping to get some help from my readers! 🙂
I have a little survey for all the girls (and heck maybe even the boys), and you can answer these questions publicly, or just email to me privately!
I appreciate all your input. I will compile the results and then write about them, and post it once published! Thanks guys!
Survey:
1) How would a potential lover go about seducing you? What requirements would that lover have to fit? (e.g. Tall, dark & handsome, geeky, smart, dumb, athletic, plump)
2) What is the most romantic thing (or something you appreciated the most) done by a partner/boy/lover/stalker?
3) What is the most unromantic/creepy thing that was ever done for you by a partner/boy/lover/stalker?
Von's Room ヴォンの部屋 
Had to think about the question for a couple of days…1) I don\’t have a type any more, but the last boy I really wanted to seduce was tall, dark, handsome, psychotic, and several thousand percent smarter than me. I think intelligence is important to an emotional connection because it\’s important to a mental connection, and I need the second one before I feel comfortable with the first (because emotions scare me). If I don\’t feel like I can learn something from a guy, he\’s probably not my first choice. 2) Definitely that my first boyfriend, whom my parents were already suspicious of and wanted to kill then bury in the backyard, sent me two dozen roses for Valentine\’s day when I was… uh, let\’s say very young and not say an age. He knew I\’d get in trouble, but be forgiven. He knew he\’d get in trouble and not be forgiven. So that was a big risk for him – but such a big thrill coming home to all those white blooms. It was terribly romantic and I\’ve never forgotten it.3) Oh Lord, where do I start… a) The most unromantic thing a boy ever did for me was show up late to our fifth anniversary concert at the Winspear Center (big, romantic event!), then just stand there with his arms at his side when I came up to hug him. In fact, he even turned his head away. We hadn\’t seen each other in about six months and I thought he\’d be happy to see me, but no. His natural distaste of me hadn\’t died down from the day we met. And we had been going out for half a decade.b) The creepiest thing a boy ever did for me (the same boy) was to completely ignore me for three months to really concentrate on his absinthe addiction. Seriously – for three months he didn\’t pick up the phone or answer an e-mail. And we had been dating for three years by this point. He sent out a lot of e-mails, though – mostly garbled poetry. I once got 24 in a single night, from 3 a.m. to 6 a.m. I would have been OK with another woman, or even another man. But a liquid?! Anyway, when his supply of the European stuff ran out and he encountered some legal problems getting it from his new supplier, he came crawling back to me. I barely recognized him. Asshole.
Oh, P.S., how incredibly rude of me to not congratulate you on being commissioned to write a column! That is awesome news. I\’m so happy that your writing will be shared with a larger audience, if there\’s anyone who deserves it it\’s you! (Oh, and if there\’s anyone who deserves a less vanilla, and more choco-caramel fudge column, it\’s also you. ;-))